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    Wednesday, March 28, 2012

    This Went Well

    Spencer M.: Our AT&T U-verse U-Basic service consists of local channels. There is a one time installation fee of $199 with this package.

    Spencer M.: We offer ESPN, ESPN-U with U-200.

    you: $199 for installing what, exactly?

    Spencer M.: TV and Internet.

    you: You're not installing a TV, and you're not installing the internet. The TV I own, and the Internet is a intangible network of interconnected computers.

    Spencer M.: Just to inform U-verse services are required to be installed by a AT&T technician.

    you: Right. But what I am asking is WHAT is being isntalled. A service is not something that gets installed. A modem, and cable box are simply electronics which would need to simply be plugged in. So, my question is what is being "installed", that would cost a new customer $199?

    Spencer M.: To ensure that your TV and Internet services are installed correctly and performs to its fullest capacity, installation by a trained AT&T technician is required.

    Spencer M.: All televisions are connected to the Gateway through coax or CAT5. The AT&T U-verse technician will perform a series of tests on your existing wiring and only wiring which doesn't meet the high quality standards will be replaced.

    Spencer M.: Does that answer your question now?

    you: Not really. But it's certainly closer.

    you: Does the installation fee only apply to the U-Basic package?

    Spencer M.: Yes.

    you: What is the next cheapest package? u-200? What is the total, per month, bundled with the 12MB internet service?

    Spencer M.: With other plans, there are no installation charges and you even get $150 rewards.

    Spencer M.: Do you want the sports package?

    you: If it is not going to cost me several thousand dollars a month, then yes.

    Spencer M.: It is $10.00/month.

    you: that is much less than multiple thousands of dollars.

    Spencer M.: Your bundle service will be at $117.00 per month before taxes for the first 6 months, at the end of 6 months the regular price of $153.00 per month will apply before taxes.

    Spencer M.: This price includes 2TVs HD feature Sports package and equipment fee.

    Spencer M.: Moreover if you sign up online today you would also get AT&T rewards worth $100.00 and additional $50.00 for ordering online (limited time offer)

    Spencer M.: Does this package sound like something you would be interested in ordering?

    Spencer M.: How does that sound to you?

    you: I'm not making the final decision. If there were butler robots, (I think DirecTV offers those) I would jump on it. But that is much more than the basic bundle. It would only take me 2 months to offset the absurd install fee, if I went with it.

    Spencer M.: Pricing and promotions are consistent for all of our customers. We are unable to change any prices or offer any promotional deals or rebates that are not already stated online.

    you: Forget it then. IF I can't have butler robots, and college football 24/7, even in the off season, I'm just going to go live in a cabin in the woods, and instead of watching Bill O'Reilly, I'll just eat a lot of mushrooms and get mauled by a wild boar. It's pretty much the same thing.

    you: And I'll be saving money.

    Monday, March 1, 2010

    Socialist Pro-Abortion Blog, "" Makes The Real George Washington Cry Wooden Tears

    I'm a huge fan of American history, I'm often tempted to file HBO's John Adams and various Ken Burns documentaries in with my pornography collection. Over the years I've found that George Washington is many things to many people; for James Manship George Washington is a 4'2" blogger who posts nearly incomprehensible sentence fragments about how the Founding Fathers did nothing but masturbate to the term "Christian Nation" and is interested in, according to this blogspot profile:


    * Dipshitary
    * Founding Fathers I know nothing about
    * Show Tunes
    * Internet Fights
    * Cosplay
    * Inaccurate History
    * Casual Encounters t4m
    * Words with Friends
    * Misrepresenting Thomas Jefferson
    * BBWs

    Note: If his current interests are not the same as above, he obviously updated them and does not prove that I made it all up.

    Believe me, I wanted to make gay porn jokes because his last name is "Manship" but I, unfortunately, could not find a single gay porn movie named "Manship," so you'll have to make your own in the comments section.

    Anyway... Wonkette and its goons took to the internets and found this guy:

    (The one on the right who doesn't look sort of melted)

    Then, as any Redcoat in his or her right mind would do, they proceeded to make fun of him for requesting people cum on pictures of Martha Washington on various anonymous image boards.

    The internets is serious business.

    Friday, February 26, 2010

    I don't typically support dress codes, but


    Wednesday, February 24, 2010

    Good evening.

    Just Amazing

    I guess it could be worse.

    So, I might be a sucker for free internet dating sites. I'm on OkCupid and Plenty Of Fish. Both have their positives and negatives, so since I'm single, I use both. You see a lot of the same people, but OKCupid has a gimmick: Tests. I know other sites have them, but with these tests you see how well you match up with people based on their answers. You can sort your matches by how well, or how poorly you match up with them.

    A little tip on the right side of the site suggest I search by "enemy" and see what I find.

    I found gold.

    hippienikki (73% Enemy)

    My Self-Summary

    What I’m doing with my life
    iAM GOiN TO SChOOl tO bE A VEt

    I think Nikki and I could find some real common ground, if only she didn't make the "blown out asshole" pouty lips face.

    believer58(60% Enemy)
    My Self-Summary
    As you can already tell i am a big christian i am a photographer and am studying to be a veternarian...

    Let me stop there. What I think she meant to say is "As you can tell, my tits are awesome and it matters so little what the rest of this says because you're just looking at my tits, I wont even bother spell checking anything.

    What I’m doing with my life
    Doesn't fucking matter look at this picture of my tits.

    It's unfortunate God didn't bless her with the tits she needed to be a "veternarian." While we are on the subject, I would like to thank God for plastic surgeons.

    Under "What I'm doing with my life" she also said she is "majoring in missionary."
    I think I will send her a message and thank her for writing the jokes for me.

    mizzshawty (50% enemy)

    My Self-Summary
    il start off wit im currently stil livin wit da tryin tu live out 6 more months there but itz gettin hard. i belive marijauna shuld be legalized,including gay marriages.i love hangin out wit ma friends because they are basically my whole life(:i have alot of experience in both gender areas ;) and if yopu want tu know more hit me up[=

    I had no idea gay marriage was a drug, I thought it was a marriage between people of the same sex. Something new every day, I guess.

    What I'm doing with my life
    im plannin on becoming a legal but seriously you have to be talented tu work a pole so strippers shuld get credit

    Admirable goals indeed and yes, they shuld get credit.

    Thank you for the suggestion OkCupid Staff Robot.

    Tuesday, February 23, 2010

    Stop listening to Jenny, she is putting your children in danger.

    I'm sure everyone is aware of Jenny McCarthy's personal crusade against vaccines, or specific vaccines, or certain additives/preservatives like Thiomersal. Since there is no credible scientific study to back up her and her followers baseless cause, it's difficult to figure out what specifically they are against.

    Lets start with Thiomersal. The concern here is that it is a mercury based preservative. Mercury is toxic, yadda yadda. The use of Thiomersal was stopped in 1999, as a preventative measure in all vaccines except for the Flu.

    Thiomersal's main use is as an antiseptic and antifungal agent. In multidose injectable drug delivery systems, it prevents serious adverse effects such as the Staphylococcus infection that, in one 1928 incident, killed 12 of 21 children inoculated with a diphtheria vaccine that lacked a preservative.(source) Unlike other vaccine preservatives used at the time, Thiomersal does not reduce the potency of the vaccines that it protects. Bacteriostatics like thiomersal are not needed in more-expensive single-dose injectables.


    There is no convincing evidence that Thiomersal is a factor in the onset of autism. Despite this, many parents, and some scientists and doctors, believe there is a connection. Parents may first become aware of autistic symptoms in their child around the time of a routine vaccination, and parental concern about vaccines has led to a decreasing uptake of childhood immunizations and an increasing likelihood of measles outbreaks. More than 5,000 U.S. families have filed claims in a federal vaccine court alleging autism was caused by vaccines, most implicating Thiomersal; the majority of these claims are still being adjudicated. The U.S. federal government agreed to award damages in one case, to a girl with a mitochondrial enzyme deficiency who developed autistic-like symptoms after receiving a series of vaccines, some of which contained Thiomersal. Many parents view this ruling as confirming that vaccines cause regressive autism; however, most children with autism do not seem to have mitochondrial disorders, and the case was conceded without proof of causation.

    It's easy to dismiss Thiomersal as a danger because of this fact:

    In the United States, countries in the European Union and a few other affluent countries, Thiomersal is no longer used as a preservative in routine childhood vaccination schedules.(Source) In the U.S., the only exceptions among vaccines routinely recommended for children are some formulations of the inactivated influenza vaccine for children older than two years.


    Most conclusively, eight major studies (as of 2008) examined the effect of reductions or removal of Thiomersal from vaccines. All eight demonstrated that autism rates failed to decline despite removal of Thiomersal, arguing strongly against a causative role.

    Thank you Wikipedia. With only the basic details we have easily removed the threat of Thiomersal from the anti-vaccination crowds list. If only Jenny McCarthy would use the Google once in a while. What is also quite fantastic is it makes that idiots other claim that Chelation Therapy (a process of removing heavy metals, like mercury, from your system) is effective in treating autism all that much more ridiculous. Furthermore, there is no scientific study to support this idea. (source)

    Jenny McCarthy has also said she gives her son B-12 shots and keeps him on a strict diet which she says has helped him "recover." How does she know this? Well, she says: “My science is Evan, and he’s at home. That’s my science.” Simply incredible.

    Why hasn't "big pharma" latched onto this miracle cure and raked in the money? I guess those MMR shots are where the real money is...

    The next concern is overdosing, like the MMR (Measles, Mumps and Rubella )vaccine. The concern here is that it's too much at one time. It overloads the childs system and suddenly he falls into some wide ranging spectrum of autism that can result in simple social awkwardness to card counting in Vegas with your jerk brother.

    This has been effectively dismissed as well thanks to the fraud Andrew Wakefield. Whose 1998 Lancet paper on the subject of MMR and Autism has been shown to be complete garbage (that's scientific jargon)

    Two down. How many to go? Honestly, I have no idea. The alternative medicine, pharma conspiracy crowed is ever evolving. It's difficult to say what other stupid nonsense these people will come up with, but I'll be sure to make fun of them childishly every chance I get.

    Parents: Please, for the love of your children, get them immunized.

    While you're at it, be sure to visit the Science-Based Medicine blog:

    And subscribe to the Quackcast podcast at